Left Them Loved Myself (Stella Spencer) novel Chapter 19

Whatever else they said after that, Stella didn’t care to listen. All the answers she might have hoped for felt ridiculous in the face of his unwavering choice.

What had she been expecting when she heard Sylvia’s name?

That Ernest would finally look her way? That he’d convince their daughter not to replace her?

A dry, humorless laugh escaped her. “Stella Spencer,” she whispered to herself, “you really are a fool. They’ve made it clear how they feel–what more are you waiting for?”

But still…

Seven years of feelings weren’t something you could just turn off overnight.

Even now, after trying so hard to change, so much of who she was had been shaped during those years with him.

Habits were terrifying that way. So were emotions.

Stella took a deep breath, pushed those unrealistic thoughts aside, and walked back to the bedroom, lying down calmly on the bed.

No Ernest ignoring her. No daughter rejecting her. Maybe… this wasn’t so bad after all.

She tried to smile–a stiff, unfamiliar expression–like a doll learning how to emote.

Life was already bitter. She had to learn to make herself happy.

But her moment of peace didn’t last long. The door opened abruptly.

Ernest walked in, and their eyes met across the dimly lit room. The night seemed to deepen the coldness in both their gazes.

This was the first time Stella had ever looked at him like this–detached, indifferent.

And honestly? It felt liberating. Not having to care about his mood, not having to please him–it was strangely empowering.

She almost smiled, but his face was like carved ice–impossible to warm. So she simply turned away.

Ernest noticed, of course.

Normally, she’d be all over him the moment he stepped in–asking if he’d eaten, if he was tired, how work was–all those meaningless questions.

At the very least, she’d help him with his coat or bring him his slippers.

But tonight, nothing.

He raised a brow slightly, then shrugged it off. He never cared much about her anyway–her attentiveness had always felt more like a nuisance than a kindness. Why bother wondering why she’d changed?

Without a word, he grabbed his change of clothes and headed toward the bathroom.

The moment he was gone, Stella let out a slow breath she didn’t realize she’d been holding.

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3:26 pm P p p

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Chapter 19

Being under the same roof as him still weighed heavily on her.

They needed to divorce sooner rather than later. It would be better for everyone.

Be vouchers

She decided she’d bring it up once he was out of the shower. But just as she was steeling herself for that conversation, the bathroom door slammed open with a startling BANG–so loud she nearly jumped off the bed.

“You…”

Before Stella could even ask what was wrong, he was already heading out the door without looking back.

She could just make out a woman’s voice–whiny, upset–coming through his phone:

“Ernest… I just accidentally…”

His reply was softer than she’d ever heard him: “Stay put. I’m on my way.”

A moment later, the sound of a car engine broke the night’s silence, leaving Stella sitting alone in bed, heart still racing. She patted her chest slowly, trying to calm herself.

“It’s okay…”

*****

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20 pm

And how… pathetic she herself must be. Stella almost felt sorry for herself.

– Vouchers.

“Mommy, what are you staring at? Hurry up and help me! I’ve got stuff to do today!”

Irene’s voice–usually so sweet–was now sharp with impatience, snapping Stella back to reality.

“Let’s go,” Stella said calmly, already turning toward the bathroom.

Irene frowned, her little arms still slightly raised, expecting to be carried like always.

Usually, her mom would scoop her up, all sweet and careful, like she was something precious.

But this time? Mom just walked away. Didn’t even look back.

A flicker of irritation shot through Irene. She wanted to stomp her foot, to yell–but then she remembered Aunt Sylvia was waiting.

She swallowed her pout and hurried after her mom.

“Mommy, how come you didn’t carry me?” Irene asked suddenly while Stella was helping her wash up.

Stella didn’t even pause. “You’re not a baby anymore. You don’t need me to carry you.”

‘You don’t need me at all anymore.‘ she thought, ‘Well–maybe not me, anyway!

“But you always carried me before,” Irene insisted, her face scrunching up.

Stella hung the towel back neatly, her tone flat. “Well, I’m not going to anymore.”

“Mommy!” Irene’s voice rose. Something felt… off. Really off.

“Do you know… About me and Aunt Sylvia going to the amusement park today?”

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