Owned By The Alphas novel Chapter 48

48. The Reason
Kai had been completely serious about not leaving my side. He literally
hadn’t. He helped me bathe, he waited while I used the toilet, I wasn’t even
allowed to brush my teeth alone.
I thought it would have gotten on my nerves by the third day, but it hadn’t.
He made me feel better. Just his presence was enough to help soothe the
aches and pains that still lingered.
I thought I was starting to get better, but the third day hit and I was
miserable again.
I sniffled, hiding in Kai’s grasp as I shivered.
I clenched my eyes shut against the throb in my head, my hand on his torso,
my nails digging in as I fought the urge to bring up the minimal amount of
water I had been able to keep down.
“Is it normal for humans to be so sick?” he whispered, his fingers running
up and down my back.
“After a hit to the head? I think so,” I said, trying to make him feel better,
but the truth was, I had no idea.
I had never really been sick. A bit of a cold every now and then but nothing
serious.
Not like the other humans. Mom had said it was the winter born in me
protecting me from the bugs, but it wasn’t protecting me from this one.
The shadows were quiet too, like they didn’t know how to help either. They
stayed calm in me, always soothing, always trying to fight the fever that had
crept back up overnight.
And the link was weaker, like something was obstructing it. It felt like there
was a block in it, but I had no idea what could cause that, and the wolves
still weren’t agreeing on whether to get Tabitha involved.
I could still feel their emotions if they were strong enough, but we couldn’t
share thoughts as easily as before. Maybe if I tried, but I was too tired at the
moment.
“Maybe it was something Elias did? Like a curse or something for killing
him?” I wondered, shivering again, getting closer to the heat of Kai’s huge
body.
He sighed heavily. “I will figure it out, Little Human. Just give me a bit
longer to convince the other two that Tabby can help.”
He kissed my forehead before hissing and putting the back of his hand
against it.
He cursed and moved away.
I shivered and whimpered, reaching for him, but he shook his head, kissing
my hand.
“I’ve got to let you cool down. Wait there,” he said, then went to the
bathroom.
He brought back a cool cloth and some water, as he had every time my
fever got out of hand.
I let him take care of me, too tired to rebel against the idea that I couldn’t
look after myself. I had to be honest with myself, I just couldn’t right now.
He laid the cloth on me, but I didn’t want it, I wanted him. I reached for
him, pressing my lips against his.
He sighed into me and I pushed my tongue along his, wanting the good
feelings he gave me to take over for just a little bit.
He growled against my lips and pulled back, the strain noticeable in the
way his eyes flashed red.
“Not yet,” he breathed.
I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and brought him back down to my
mouth.
“We can go slow. I want to feel good,” I whispered.
He didn’t answer me, but his lips kept moving over mine, so I said nothing,
kissing him back.
I arched into him as he pressed me gently against the mattress. My leg went
up around his narrow waist, and I deepened our kiss.
And then he pulled back, breathing hard, digging his claws into his thighs,
turning away from me.
“Come back,” I breathed, and he shook his head.
“We need to find out what’s wrong with you,” he bit determinedly. And
then he was climbing from the bed and scooping me up in his arms.
“What’s wrong is I haven’t had any of you in too long and my body is
having a physical reaction to that trauma,” I teased, and he smirked.
“I wish that was true, Little Human. But just to make sure, I’m taking you
to Tabitha’s,” he decided.
It was where I had been telling them to take me for days, so I didn’t mind.
Until Brax swung the door to my suite open with a feral snarl.
“No you’re fucking not.”
“Brax, move,” Kai warned.
Brax shook his head. “She’s not going there. Tabitha is the reason she’s
even sick in the first place,” he argued, still blocking the door.
“We don’t know the reason. You won’t let me turn her. You won’t let me
take her to Tabby. Any other suggestions then, Brax? Because if you’re
fresh out of ideas on how the hell we get her better, then get the fuck out of
my way so I can do something instead of just sitting here,” Kai growled.
I clung to him, looking over the fear in Brax’s face. I hated that he was so
torn, but there was nothing I could do. He had to learn to trust Tabby in his
own time.
“I thought that hiding in here was all you wanted to do?” Brax challenged.
“Go out there and you risk meeting your mate.”
I sucked in a breath, wincing at the painful reminder that Kai and I were
living on borrowed time together.
Kai snarled, and I was pretty sure he would have charged Brax if I hadn’t
been in his arms. He might’ve been about to do it anyway when Derik
stepped in the room, his face somber.
“I’ll take her,” he said, holding his arms out.
Kai narrowed his eyes on Derik. “You’ve changed your mind?” Kai
checked, and Derik nodded.
“Yes. She needs something that we obviously don’t have, and we have no
other options. We promised to keep her safe, and her mother is asking
questions. She wants to know why she didn’t come home on the full moon
like we promised.
“If our word is questioned then the humans might start getting rebellious.
This is the only thing we can do—and hope that something good will come
of it,” Derik explained, and my heart twisted painfully at the thought of my
mother finding out exactly what I had been doing on the full moon instead
of visiting her.
Kai hesitated, then handed me over to Derik.
“Keep her safe,” he warned, before kissing me. “See you soon, Little
Human. Only you,” he said, kissing me again before Derik stepped back.
Brax was seething, anger rolling off him and tainting the link, but he still
followed Derik out the door, shutting Kai in my suite where he lived now.
“Thank you,” I said, my eyelids closing as I leaned into the crook of Derik’s
neck.
He held me tightly and said nothing, running me downstairs and out the
door, putting me on his lap in the carriage. Brax sat next to me, putting my
legs across him, grabbing my hand as the carriage moved.
We made it to Tabitha’s quicker than last time, and when we got out, she
was already waiting for us with Cain. She chuckled at us.
“Kai is quite determined not to mate, isn’t he?” She smiled with those
knowing eyes, and I immediately got curious as to what she knew.
Brax stopped on the porch, refusing to get closer until they moved inside.
“Hasn’t left her room in days.” Derik shook his head.
“And I am assuming you have brought her here for answers?” Tabitha said,
like she didn’t already know, but I found that hard to believe since the sofa
was already pulled into the middle of the room, the teapot already boiling
with five cups in front of it.
Derik laid me down, then kissed my forehead as I rested my eyelids for a
bit, still listening but just so tired.
“She has a concussion from Elias, but she’s not getting better,” he admitted.
“A concussion can last for weeks, sometimes months in humans. You think
she has something different though, don’t you?” Tabitha said in that smiley
voice that said she already knew the answer.
“I don’t think anything, I’m worried. We were hoping you could help.” He
sighed, bending down in front of me, kissing my cheek and pushing my hair
back from my damp face.
I forced my eyelids open to look at him, moving to kiss him. He kissed
back, then took the tea that Tabby handed him out to Brax.
I sat up a little more, expecting a tea, but she never handed one over to me.
I frowned at that; normally she did.
“Not for you, deary. I’ll pour you a cup soon,” she said with a wink before
sipping her own, sinking into her rocking chair next to the sofa I was on.
Derik came back in then and grabbed his cup. He sat on the end of the
couch as Cain grabbed his. They all sipped their tea, the silence almost
deafening.
“Do you know what’s wrong with me? Or is it just a concussion?” I asked,
sick of waiting.
Tabby smiled behind her cup. “Oh, there is nothing just about a winter born,
deary.
And yes, I have a suspicion. But we are waiting for Kai before I explain,”
she said, and I frowned, sitting up with stiff movements.
“Kai is back—”
“Thanks, Tabby.” Kai grinned, coming out of the room to the left that I
think was the bedroom.
I raised my brows at Tabby and Kai, who grabbed his tea and emptied the
cup. He planted a kiss on Tabby’s cheek, then mine.
He sat down on the ground in front of the sofa before hanging his arms on
his knees, like it was totally normal that he had appeared out of thin air.
“How?” I asked.
“Magic, of course. A simple summoning spell that I reserve for special
cases,” Tabby grinned, eyeing Kai, who grinned back at her.
I shook my head, not sure how to begin to process that but winced when it
made my skull ache. But I didn’t bother questioning it anymore.
Tabitha had her own system or magic thing she had going on, and it wasn’t
something I felt like she was going to explain to me anytime soon.
I was too human.
My head throbbed again to remind me of that fact, and I grimaced.
Kai reached over his shoulder and held my hand.
“Braxton. I do believe it will be easier to hear and more polite if you were
to bring your presence inside,” Tabitha said in between sips.
The door opened and Brax came in with a thunderous glare in her direction.
He slammed it shut, then leaned up against the wall.
“Can you fix her?” Brax asked, not even trying to contain the hostility in his
voice.
Tabitha smiled anyway and shook her head no. Even my shoulders sagged
in defeat at that.
“No,” she said, taking a sip of her tea. “But you can.”
“How?” Kai demanded.
“Patience, sweetness.” She smiled.
I was really going to have to get her to teach me how she deactivated Kai’s
crazy so quickly.
Kai leaned back and waited as Tabitha got up. She moved to her cabinets
that were covered in crystals and potions, herbs and spices, plants and
candles.
As she began mixing, putting everything in a wooden cup, I watched in
fascination, listening as she hummed.
“The thing is, what has happened has never actually happened before. I
wasn’t even sure it could happen. I had my suspicions, but they were not
founded until now.”
She smiled, still adding and mixing as Cain waited in the kitchen in all his
black clothes and piercings, watching every move like a hawk.
Brax got crankier at that, while Kai looked on hopefully. Derik clutched his
cup in a tight hold.
“You knew she would get sick?” Brax growled, but Tabitha shook her head.
“Not sick. I wondered if she might get weaker.”
“Does it have anything to do with the shadows? Elias’s ones inside her?”
Derik asked, and I waited for the “Yes, she’s going to die” comment, but it
never came.
Instead, she turned to us all, a smile wide on her face, her eyes glistening as
she looked at each of us, then landed her gaze on me.
“No. Those shadows are helping her. I daresay she’d be much sicker than
she is now if she didn’t have those helping to keep up her strength.”
“Why? What’s wrong with me?” I asked, sick of her not giving a straight
answer.
Especially when she clearly knew.
But Tabitha just smiled. “Nothing is wrong with you, deary. We just have to
—”
“Tabby. Give us the answer we came for. Please,” Kai asked in a tone that I
had only heard in the last few days. The desperate one, the pleading one.
It broke my heart and had Tabitha turning to us all with a hesitant look
before she sighed and handed over the concoction in the cup to Cain.
He whispered some words on it before handing it back. She took it and put
it down in front of me.
It was purple, waves of aroma wafting out, but it had my mouth salivating.
My headache lessened just at the smell of it, and I looked back up at Tabby,
who nodded with a soft smile.
I grabbed the cup and sipped it, surprised at how warm it was. It tasted
amazing, like a vanilla smoothie, and softened all the aches and pains,
leaving nothing but a homey, cozy feeling inside me.
Kai turned to face me, waiting. Brax looked ready to kill Tabitha the instant
I showed any sign of a bad reaction, and Derik just sat there, silent and
tense.
But I felt better. I still had the weakness there, but it wasn’t accompanied by
pain for the first time in days.
“I feel better. Thank you,” I said, sipping more of the potion, whatever it
was.
“As I suspected then. You’ll need to drink that every day to stay on top of
the pain.”
She nodded toward the drink, then turned to put more of the same
ingredients in a large jar.
“Cain will come and spell the ingredients for you,” she said, and I frowned.
“Every day for the rest of my life? Why? What is it fixing?” I asked, putting
the empty cup back on the table with Kai’s help.
I sat up, propped on the arm and cushions. Tabitha paused her actions, then
turned to me. She smiled and came over, grabbing my hand. I let her, and
she held it tight.
Kai shuffled out of the way so she could sit on the sofa next to me, perched
on the edge, her long, loose patterned dress flowing over our hands.
“Is your link open?” she asked. “Stronger now?”
I checked the link with my wolves, grinning as their thoughts and emotions
filled me. I nodded. “Yes.”
“Then close your eyes. I will show all of you what I see,” she said, and
Brax growled.
I looked over at him. “Please, Brax?” I asked, and he pursed his lips but
nodded once, coming to stand behind the sofa, as close as he could get.
I knew through the link that it was a protection detail. Derik shuffled closer,
his hand on my leg, as Kai grabbed my other hand.
“Okay.” I nodded, and she grinned before my eyes closed with hers.
And I saw it. The vision she saw. It was everywhere, so many pictures, so
many possible futures spinning through my mind so fast, until a single
thread stood out.
A baby.
A tiny, formed human child rolling inside what looked like a womb,
floating, but it was staring at me, like it knew I was watching it.
I gasped and snatched my hand back, my eyes snapping open, my gaze
clashing with Tabitha’s.

49. The Answers
“That’s impossible. I can’t be pregnant. I’m not a werewolf.”
“You have been unfaithful?” Derik frowned, and I glared at him.
“You can shove that question up your ass. You know that I haven’t been,” I
snapped, then turned to Tabby again.
“It was a possible outcome of the link. One I saw but didn’t believe,” she
explained.
“And you didn’t think I should know that before giving me the link?” I
asked, tears springing to my eyes.
I wanted to have their baby more than anything. I wanted to give them that,
but Kai was branded. He was going to be mated with someone else.
What could that mean for us and a child? It would be heartache after
heartache, and I wasn’t ready for that yet.
“I’m not mating,” Kai breathed, looking at me, tilting my chin to him. “You
hold our baby inside you, Little Human. I will not leave your side, mate or
not,” he vowed, and the tears fell.
He kissed my lips softly and I pulled away, turning to Tabitha for more
answers.
“The link is a mating brand. One that can be just as powerful as a true
mating depending on who has it. It was shown to me that a child could be
born from such a strong connection.
“I was under the impression having an alpha’s child wouldn’t be as
upsetting for you,” Tabitha said, then moved away to continue making her
potion brew.
I shook my head and wiped my tears away, turning to Derik, who was
frowning, looking down. Brax was staring at me, his eyes on my stomach.
I turned to Tabitha. “And carrying a werewolf made me sick?” I asked,
needing to straighten out my thoughts.
“Oh, yes. You are human; your body is not made to carry werewolf magic
inside you. If you weren’t winter born, you’d be dead. However, your
shadows and Elias’s have kept you alive. Unfortunately it won’t be enough,
even with this potion. That is where the wolves will need to help,” she
explained, and handed the jar to Derik, who took it robotically.
“How can we help?” he asked, his voice quiet.
“With the magic from the child polluting her body, she will need help to
keep it—
and her—alive. The magic is usually absorbed by a werewolf female and
pushed back into the fetus, but since she doesn’t have that ability, you will
need to give her your werewolf toxin,” she explained.
I sat there, trying to take it all in, but I was still stuck on the idea that I
could carry a werewolf baby without getting us both killed.
“The bite will kill her!” Brax snarled, but Tabitha shook her head.
“Not with that baby inside her. It will absorb the toxin. It needs it to grow
and to develop. So, you will bite her every day, as well as getting her to
drink the potion, and that will keep them both healthy. More than that, I
assume.”
She smiled, sinking into her rocking chair like this was a casual discussion,
when to me, it felt anything but casual.
My life was tipping on its axis, threatening to fold in on itself. I couldn’t get
past the fact that I was going to have a baby. My alpha’s child. And Kai
wouldn’t be a part of it. Not like Brax and Derik.
I pushed the pain away and tried to get back to the only answers I had. “You
assume?”
“Well, prediction is not an exact science, but I daresay pushing alpha toxin
through this child in utero will create a very strong child. An alpha so
strong…one this age has not seen.” She smiled, and I swallowed hard.
“And you think with the bite and the potion, that I will be able to survive
it?” I asked, and the slight hesitation had the tension tightening in the room.
“What aren’t you telling us?” Brax demanded, and Tabitha looked at Cain,
who nodded.
“Tell them. They should know it’s a possibility. A high one,” he urged, and
Tabitha nodded.
“Yes. Well,” she sighed, “first of all, you can’t use your shadows. Now that
your child has formed enough, they need to stay in you to keep you and it
alive.
“Secondly, from what I can see when I peek in on the little fella, he is
already very developed. Not big, a tiny thing still, but fully formed as a
baby.
“This means he has skipped the stages of human development, the
werewolf magic helping it grow as a pup would in a werewolf, developing
on its size and magic.
Which means—”
“The child may shift into a wolf while in utero,” Derik said, his eyes going
wide, his face paling.
I sucked in a breath as I thought about that little baby I had seen turning
into a wolf. The claws, the teeth. It would tear through me. I shivered, and
Kai grabbed my hand.
“It is only a possibility, and as long as she doesn’t get too worked up, no
overt emotions like anger or sadness, then the wolf within the child
shouldn’t feel the need to come forward,” Tabitha explained, but I was still
terrified.
If Kai mated while I was pregnant, those emotions were an inevitability.
And we all knew it.
“I’m staying with you, Little Human. I won’t mate,” he said again, but he
had promised it over and over again. I still didn’t believe fate was going to
be thwarted like that.
“And the toxin? That won’t help her survive or at least heal from something
like that? It could make her turn, couldn’t it?” Brax asked, finally not
hostile as he questioned her.
Tabitha looked at him sadly.
“Unfortunately, no. The child will take every drop of toxin that enters her
bloodstream at the moment. It will need to. And it will grow using it. But
that is where the good news comes in.” She smiled.
I looked at her, hopeful as anything, like the naive girl I had been when I
first came to the wolves as a virgin.
“Good news for who?” I mumbled, and she smiled wider.
“All of you. Once the child has been born, Lorelai will turn. The residual
toxins from carrying will pollute her blood and she will become one of you.
It is a guarantee, her body will be used to the toxins by then and adapt. It
will be an easy transition for her.”
“If I survive the pregnancy,” I muttered, and Tabitha’s face fell a little.
She nodded slightly. “Take that jar back with you. Cain will see you every
day, and the wolves will give you their bite. It will help,” she said, trying to
push the optimism around, but I wasn’t ready to feel it.
“Is there anything you can do about Kai’s mating brand?” I asked, and then
all her hope disappeared with mine.
“No, Lorelai. Unfortunately, I don’t have the power to redirect what fate has
chosen,” she whispered, and I nodded.
I stood up from the couch, thankful I could stand on my own legs without
collapsing. Kai helped me anyway as Derik stood.
He took our cups to the wash bench, then whispered something to Cain that
I couldn’t hear and didn’t come through the link, so I assumed it was
werewolf business. Brax and Kai shadowed me to the door.
“Thanks for everything, Tabitha,” I murmured, then left, wishing I could be
more grateful for the answers I had been given.
Kai lifted me over the shallow part of the pond and into the carriage. My
alphas followed, and then we were heading back. Quiet. Tense.
“Lorelai?” Derik checked.
I turned to him, and I’m not sure what he saw in my face, but he winced.
“I know this is going to be hard on you, and probably us, but I want to
reassure you.
I am unbelievably happy that you carry our child.
“I don’t know what we did to deserve such a miracle, maybe it was
restoring balance through killing Elias, but this news? It’s made everything
worth it,” he said, his feelings shining through the link.
I smiled at him, shuffling to him and cuddling into him. He held me tightly,
kissing the top of my head.
“I want to be excited,” I murmured.
“But this fucking brand is ruining everything?” Kai snapped as his claws
came out.
He looked down at the brand, and I knew what he was going to do. I rushed
over to him just as he pierced his skin with a claw.
“Don’t!” I said, sinking into his lap, distracting him.
He huffed angrily before he found my lips, covering them with a desperate
kiss that woke my core full force. It had been dull, almost dormant before,
but with the link back and the potion working, I felt everything.
And it was a feeling I had missed.
Heat rose within me so fast as he claimed my mouth, and I moaned as his
fingers dragged up my thigh. He pushed me down on the seat, his mouth
never leaving mine.
“I will be a part of this,” he growled, and I didn’t answer, knowing if fate
really wanted him mated, then he would be. There was nothing we could
do.
But I could play ignorant and pretend it didn’t exist until it happened. Then
I could be happy with the child I had been given. Which meant I could be
happy with my alphas in the moment.
Kai’s mouth was demanding and hot as he kissed me. It wasn’t until he was
lifting my nightgown skirt and undoing the strings of his pants that I
realized how much I had missed the connection with my alphas.
“You sure you’re okay?” Brax asked, kissing my forehead, brushing my
tendrils of hair back, watching with hungry eyes.
I nodded. “I will be soon. Once I’ve had all of you,” I breathed, and Kai
grinned, pushing his cock inside me.
I gripped his bicep, the muscles straining as he moved slow, spreading my
legs wider, finally filling my body with the heat and pleasure it had been
craving.
I reached up to kiss him again, rocking my hips into him as he growled.
“Can I go faster?” he strained out, and I nodded.
“Please,” I begged.
And then he was fucking me like he used to, like an animal, wild and carnal
with desire, claiming me as his, promising me so much more than his body
and an orgasm.
I cried out as he fucked me, the intensity something more than it had ever
been, and then his fangs dropped and he slowed.
“Are you going to bite me?” I breathed, not sure if I was ready.
Kai nodded. “It will feel good. I promise you, Little Human. It will feel so
fucking good,” he said.
And it did. It felt like heaven and bliss all rolled into one euphoric high
when his fangs, dripping with toxin, buried in the side of my breast.
I could barely breathe as pleasure and fire took over the blood in my veins.
I arched up to him, his cock filling me again and again as he grunted and
groaned, the ecstasy hitting him too.
I had never felt so good or so high. I clutched him tight, his hair in my fist
as his mouth stayed on my breast, sucking the spot he had his fangs in.
And then I was releasing the pressure in an orgasm that tore me apart.
Everything but him dulled, and I was blind to the world that wasn’t him.
“Kai!” I screamed, and he came hard, his hips bucking, his hot seed filling
my pussy as his fangs dripped, stained from my flesh.
It was moments later when I could finally come down from the high. I was
breathing hard, sweating out the last of the pleasure.
My blood tingled as he climbed off me and tucked himself in before helping
me up.
He leaned down and licked over the bite. I shivered at the embers it ignited
in my core.
Kai kissed my lips, then let me go and leaned back against the seat with a
sigh.
“I missed being inside you so fucking much,” he breathed, and I grinned,
feeling better than I had since killing Elias.
“I missed all of you,” I said, before meeting Derik’s gaze.
He was just as ready as I was to end our dry spell. I went to him, climbing
on his lap as he shifted my nightgown to sit at my waist. He was already
ready and waiting, so hard I could see the throbbing in the veins down his
cock.
I sank down onto him, sighing as being filled by him set my body alight in
flames from the embers Kai had left.
I gripped the leather behind his head and rode his dick hard, not wanting to
take my time, just wanting to feel everything I could with him.
Something about the link being wide open and everything finally feeling
normal inside me had the pleasure so much more intense, and I took full
advantage of it.
I slammed down on him, my weakness not even existing anymore. I wanted
more, harder, and he read me like a book, slamming himself into me with
grunts and pushes until he grabbed me and kissed me.
I missed everything about the way he kissed. Derik’s lips met mine, tugging
and tender as we kept going, our hips meeting, my core burning.
“Derik,” I whispered against his lips, the tension in me building higher.
He moved quicker, knowing I needed everything from him. And he gave it
to me, burning through everything I had, replacing every emotion with
pleasure and ecstasy until I couldn’t handle it anymore, letting go, a wild
storm suffocating my voice, heat flooding my veins.
My pussy tightened around his cock, milking it as he came, his thrusts
going so deep inside me it hit the achy, can’t-handle-your-dick spot that
made my orgasm so much more intense.
He stilled as his cum filled me before slumping back, breathing hard, his
eyes closing. I leaned against his chest, his heart thumping fast against his
chest and my ear, before Brax’s hands were lifting me.
I smiled and went into his hold, kissing him hard. He kissed back, then
turned me around, bending me over the leather seat.
He ran his fingers down my spine, lifting my nightgown over my ass,
sliding his tip along my soaking folds. He slipped beneath them, brushing
my clit, and I shuddered, pressing back into him.
“I want to feel you, Brax,” I prompted, and he leaned down to kiss my
shoulder.
“Are you sure you’re okay to keep going? I can wait until you’ve had a rest
if you need it,” he whispered against me, and as an answer, I reached behind
us and spread my cheeks for him.
His tip sank in, and we both moaned. He slid the rest of the way in, and I
sucked in a breath at the way he sank straight into my core, hitting the right
spot on the first thrust.
And then he was moving, fucking me hard from behind, filling me over and
over again, making up for all the time we had lost.
His grip on my hips stayed tight as I clutched the leather of the seat, my
eyes clenched closed, trying to contain the pressure within my body.
But there was no point. It had been too long, and I had missed the feeling of
his dick inside me too much. It barely took a minute before I was back at
that pinnacle, waiting to fall off the edge with him.
He growled as his cock thickened within me, his strokes more desperate.
“Brax. Fuck,” I panted, and then he was there with me, pushing us both off
the edge with feral thrusts that had me clenching my pussy walls against his
cock, crying out and sinking into oblivion with him.
He pulled out of me a few moments later, then fell back on the seat next to
Kai, putting himself away but not bothering to do up the strings on his
pants. Just like the other two.
I sat back on the seat next to Derik and looked over them, smiling. I just
had to live in the now. For now, they were mine, and for now, we could be
happy about the child we were having.
“We are happy,” Brax breathed, and I smiled wider.
So was I.
As long as I looked past the possibility of being ripped apart by that child.
Past the brand that Kai wore.
Past the fact that the only way I could survive was by taking a bite that was
going to turn me, a choice I had now had taken from me.
My smile faltered, and the emotions filled me. Ones that had been
temporarily pushed aside. But they were back, and it hit me that the only
comfort I wanted wasn’t one that I had been able to get to but desperately
needed.
“Can you take me to see my mom?” I asked.
Derik nodded, none of them saying anything about my thoughts. “We’ll
take you there now,” he said.
“What are you going to tell her?” Brax asked.
“Everything. I want her to know everything,” I murmured. “Is that
allowed?” I asked, and Kai grinned.
“Little Human. You carry our child. You will be this pack’s luna once it is
born. You can do whatever you want now.” He grinned, and that was the
best silver lining I’d heard yet.
I fell asleep until we got to my village, and when I woke, Kai was carrying
me toward my mother’s hut in the dark.
I could feel Brax and Derik but couldn’t see them.
“They’ve gone to check on your father. They’re concerned about the
numbers he keeps lying about.”
Kai answered my unspoken question, and I snuggled into him, the brisk
wind hitting through my nightgown.
“I can walk now, you know?”
He looked down at me and grinned. “I know. I like holding you,” he said,
kissing me just as we got to my old home, putting me down before letting
my lips go.
I knocked on the door. “You three should go home. I’m going to stay with
Mom tonight,” I said, and Kai nodded.
“We’ll come back at noon tomorrow to collect you,” he said, stepping back.
I smiled, my heart warming at how understanding he was that I needed my
mom.
Mom answered the door a few moments later with a candle lantern, her face
brightening when she saw me. I ran into her, hugging her thin frame so
tightly she stumbled back.
“Mom,” I whispered.
“Sweetheart, are you okay?” she asked. “You never came on the full moon.”
I leaned back with tears in my eyes and shook my head.
She held my face. “I’ll start the teapot.”
She smiled sympathetically, and it was exactly what I needed.
I sat with her, told her everything, cried in her arms about the pregnancy
and the mating brand. She listened, soothed, comforted, and it was
everything I had been missing.
I loved my wolves, I loved the life they gave me, but nothing was the same
without Mom. I needed her too.
I fell asleep in her bed with her, cuddled into her like I used to do when I
was a child, and it made everything seem okay, like it was all going to work
out.
I should have known life wasn’t going to let that happen.
I woke up later being jostled around, my shadows jarring inside me. I
frowned, and my eyes flung open, expecting to see my mom, but it wasn’t
her. It was my father.
He yanked me out of bed, hauling me toward the door, my mom asleep or
unconscious since she didn’t budge on the bed, her eyes staying closed.
I screamed out, trying to yank my arm back, but he had my bicep in his
tight grasp, the skin bruising.
“Let me go! What are you doing?! Dad!” I screamed, and he clamped his
hand over my mouth.
“Shut up. I’m doing this for your own good,” he hissed, dragging me out
the front door into the dark night, where men dressed in army clothes
grabbed me.
They gagged me, placed a bag over my head, roped my hands together. I
screamed against the gag, tears prickling my eyes, falling quickly.
I stumbled as they tugged the rope and me forward. I had no choice but to
go wherever they were taking me.
I screamed down the link and felt the wolves wake. They knew I was in
trouble.
They would come now, so I had to stall.
I dropped to the ground, refusing to move. They tugged the rope, but I
yanked it back, planting my feet.
My father was by my ear then. “You will move, or I will shove a blade
through your stomach and kill the parasite you carry,” he warned.
My tears fell and I inched forward.
“Good girl,” he said, then stepped away. “Now move quickly, she would’ve
reached out to her wolves by now, and we need her underground before
they get here. The wolfsbane and gardenia fields will cover her scent once
we get there,” my father said.
I sobbed against my gag. My shadows were so angry, desperate to help, but
listened when I told them to stay where they were. If I used them, it could
hurt the baby. I had no choice, I had to do what they said.
I was led to the men’s village. I recognized the change in ground beneath
my feet, the soggy mud squelching between my toes.
I was pushed inside somewhere with wooden floors and then down some
stairs. I was shoved forward, and I fell to my knees, my heart racing as I
tried to figure out where I was, but there was nothing to see.
I smelled dirt and dampness, but there was nothing defining enough. I spun
to where I had come from, just as my father removed my blindfold and gag.
I rushed him, bashing on his chest.
“Let me out! You have to let me go!” I screamed at him, and he shoved me
back.
I hit the concrete wall with a thud, the air rushing out of me. I cried as I
faced him. I couldn’t believe he was the one doing this to me.
And it was then that I knew.
It was his hatred that had darkened my brother, it was his will to take down
the wolves. I could see it so clearly when he looked at me, his eyes full of
disgust.
“You are not going back to them. Not after everything I heard you tell your
mother.
Not after what you did to your brother.
“That child you carry is an abomination, and I will not allow you back out
there to ruin everything we have worked for years to accomplish,” he
snapped, and my heart broke at his words.
“What are you planning? What are you going to do?” I demanded through
my tears.
He gave me one last look before backing out the door.
I chased after him. “Don’t hurt them!” I screamed at him, just before he
slammed it in my face.
He opened the wooden flap and looked down at me. “I don’t want to hurt
them, Lorelai, I want to kill them, and if you were still human then you
would too. You can stay here until it’s over.”
He grinned and I shook my head.
“Please. Don’t. You don’t have to do this. Whatever the humans want, we
can work it out. Don’t! Dad!” I screamed as he walked away.
“You don’t understand! I need them! You’re going to kill me and your
grandchild if you don’t let me out!” I tried, fear pouring into me.
He didn’t care. The flap slammed shut, and I backed up against the back
wall, my heart racing, my chest heaving, panic taking me.
I had no access to the potion I needed, or the bite. I had no idea how long it
was going to take the wolves to find me…if they could.
I stretched my mind out, hunting for the link, but it was gone, disappeared
or smothered by whatever herbal properties they had used to hide my scent.
I sobbed against my hand. I was stuck, trapped with no way out, in some
kind of cell and apparently underground. I had no idea if the wolves were
going to be able to find me.
I couldn’t sense them. I was completely alone.
“Let me out!” I screamed again, running at the door, bashing on it. I tested
my shadows, but they were hesitant, a warning stirring in me that coming
out would hurt my baby.
I couldn’t risk it. I just had to survive. I knew it was going to hurt, I was
going to go back to the pain I had been in before with only my shadows to
keep me alive, but then again, I had survived on them before.
Years ago, when I was a baby, the humans had forced me into survival
mode, leaving me in the snow to die, just like they were leaving me here
now.
But I had survived. Because I wasn’t just human. I was a fucking winter
born.
And I was going to remind them exactly how strong that made me.
End of Book One