Pregnant and Rejected by My Alpha Mate novel Chapter 89

#Chapter 89 Breeding

Selene’s pov

“What?” I ask, unable to conjure any other words.

“I’ve been away too long,” Bastien sighs, “And so have you.” He adds pointedly. Suddenly I realize he must have dropped everything to come here. He has so many responsibilities in Elysium, I don’t know how he managed it. Who’s been running the pack while he’s been busy chasing me around Asphodel? The council?

Next I wonder how none of this occurred to me before. We can hardly be together while living in separate cities. In Bastien’s mind, I probably agreed to come back to Elysium the moment I let him claim me. The last card in my hand had been needing to keep Lila near her father, and that excuse went out the window when I told him the truth about the DNA test.

“Bastien, I have a life here.” I reply hesitantly,

“You had a life there too:” Bastien reminds me, brushing a few strands of hair out of my eyes.

“No.” I correct him. “I had you and nothing else. Here I have a business, friends, a purpose beyond standing beside you and looking pretty.”

“That’s not what I want for you, Selene. You can have all those things in Elysium. You could have had those things before if…” He trails off, uncertain why I hadn’t shown an interest in opening a cafe or having a life of my own when we were married. Puzzled and clearly concerned he asks, Did you think I wouldn’t let you?”

“No.” I exhale heavily, “It wasn’t anything you did, well, not in the way you mean.” I amend, reaching up to stroke my mate’s clenched jaw. “You have to understand. When you first rescued me I was completely helpless. I did need you to do everything for me, and you were so willing to take on that role that you never pushed me to step out of my comfort zone or do anything for myself. At the time I thought it was because you didn’t think I was capable of standing on my own two feet.” I share, reaching into my memories.

.

“If I coddled you, it’s because I love you.” Bastien informs me, looking perturbed. “I didn’t push you because taking care of you was never a burden to me, I wanted to do everything for you. I never wanted you to have to struggle again.”

“I know that now.” I assure him gently, but I never learned how to fend for myself. I never got far enough out into the world to find myself, to figure out who I was and what I wanted out of life.”

“It had only been three years,” Bastien argues protectively. “You made incredible progress in that time, considering where you started. Goddess, Selene, you were trapped in a basement through your entire adolescence.” He reminds me – as if I could forget. “You had to learn everything from scratch, all while trying to figure out how to be a wife and an Alpha’s mate.”

“And I did it in a bubble.” I proclaim firmly, “When I came here I didn’t have a choice. Drake helped me get the apartment and provided for me financially, but I had to figure out how to survive on my own. I had to figure out what I wanted to do with the rest of my life.”

“So do those things in Elysium.” Bastien beseeches, “It won’t be like before.”

“Bastien, you said it yourself, being an Alpha’s mate is a lot more than just being a wife.” I’m trying to choose my words carefully, but I’m not sure how successful my efforts are. My mate is looking grumpier by the minute. “It’s a full time job with a lot of responsibilities, if I go back I won’t have a choice anymore.”

Dragging one large hand through his hair, Bastien huffs in frustration. “What did you think was going to happen when I claimed you Selene? That you and Lila would stay here when I went back home?” He eyes my flat tummy. “For Goddess’s sake, you’re probably breeding already.”

“Excuse me?” I squeak, not sure I heard him correctly.

Bastien rolls his eyes. “You’re in heat, Selene.”

The man seems determined to tell me things I already know this evening. “So?” I exclaim, throwing my hands up.

My mate appears to be praying for patience, bringing his palms together and speaking very deliberately, “You’re the most fertile you’ll ever be, and we’ve had unprotected sex a dozen times since it began.”

I blindly reach behind me, seeking the edge of the island to brace myself. Suddenly my knees feel like jelly. How could I have failed to connect those dots? Without contraception heat cycles almost always result in babies – it’s kind of the entire point.

“All the more reason for you to come home.” Bastien asserts, entirely unyielding. “You belong in Elysium. You and Lila belong with me.” His massive hands squeeze my hips, and if you are carrying another pup, they’ll belong with me too.”

“I know that!” i burst out, finally speaking my truth. “I don’t want to be apart from you! I don’t want Lila to go another day without her father!”

“Then why are you fighting me, little wolf?” Bastien demands, emanating pure ferocity.

“Because I don’t want to go back to being that person!” My throat scratches uncomfortably, and I can already hear the tears in my voice. “I don’t want to go back to being weak and afraid and useless!”

“You were never weak.” Bastien growls, fire burning in his eyes. “You survived things no other wolf could. You managed to hold onto your heart through years of torture and abuse.” He professes, “And you were never useless. Not to me.”

“You know what I mean.” I hiccup, unable to meet his gaze. “I don’t want it to be like before. I don’t want to be bullied by jealous she-wolves and sit idly by while you govern the pack.”

Kissing my brow and gathering me to his chest, Bastien promises, “That’s not who we are anymore, baby.”

“Promise me it will be different.” I request in a small voice, “Promise me it will be better.”

“I promise.” His deep voice wraps around me like an embrace, and even though my fear urges me not to believe him – I can’t help

but trust my mate.

Burying my head in his chest for one long moment to try and get hold of my tears, I make my decision.”When do we leave?”