Too Lazy to be a Villainess novel Chapter 144

Chapter 144: From Dungeons to Declarations

[Lavinia’s POV—Dawnspire Wing, Her Chamber]

I plopped backward onto the absurdly fluffy mountain of pillows with a groan so dramatic, the bards outside probably thought I was dying again.

"Thank the gods," I mumbled, "finally alone. Blessedly horizontal. No lectures, no tears, no glowing elf hands on my throat. Just peace... soft sheets... and sweet, sacred silence."

I closed my eyes, relishing the moment. It was so quiet I could almost hear the palace breathing around me.

"I wonder..." I whispered into the air, "when Osric’s coming ba—"

THUMP.

Heavy.

Very heavy.

Too heavy.

I cracked one eye open.

A giant golden paw flopped across my stomach like an affectionate sack of bricks. Then—

SLURP.

My cheek was suddenly under siege from a rough, wet tongue.

"Marshi!" I yelped, swatting at the massive, glittering furball now sprawled entirely on top of me like a sentient mattress.

He chuffed happily, tail swishing like a battle flag in victory. His big, stupid divine beast eyes sparkled with affection. Golden fur shimmered like sunlit flame, and he purred deep in his throat—loud enough to shake my bones.

"I—I can see you’re thrilled to see me alive," I wheezed, face smushed under his chin. "But Marshi, darling love of my life, if you keep lying on me like this—I’m going to die again."

He responded by licking my eyebrow.

I was smothered. This was it. This was how I’d go: flattened by a celestial tiger who loved too hard.

"I survived poison for this," I grunted. "Truly poetic."

And then—

"PRINCESSSS."

My head flopped sideways like a defeated pancake. I cracked open one eye again.

There he was.

Osric.

Standing in the doorway, slightly out of breath like he’d run here, eyes wide with too many feelings he’d never say out loud.

I raised a single, limp hand in greeting. "Welcome back from the dungeon," I rasped. "I trust you had a lovely vacation."

He blinked. And then—

That rare thing.

He smiled. Not the polite, knightly version. The real one. 𝕗𝐫𝐞𝕖𝕨𝐞𝗯𝚗𝕠𝘃𝐞𝚕.𝐜𝗼𝚖

"I did," he said, stepping forward. "The accommodations were... rustic. But the company—well, the rats were friendly."

I snorted.

"How are you feeling, Princess?"

I gestured dramatically at my situation. "If this divine beast doesn’t get off me soon, please start planning my funeral. Open casket. Embroidered gown. Lots of dramatic sobbing."

Osric chuckled, gaze drifting to Marshi—who had not moved an inch, mind you—and then back to me. "He’s missed you."

"I can tell," I deadpanned, pinned under four hundred pounds of celestial fluff. "I feel so loved. And also, mildly crushed."

Osric stepped closer, eyes warm. Then he crouched slightly and patted Marshi on the head like he was a misbehaving toddler instead of a sacred apex predator.

"There, there, Marshi. Your master is alive and well... but if you don’t get off her, I’ll have to resuscitate her again. And she will make me pay for it."

Marshi blinked.

Then, with the grand dignity only divine creatures possess, he sloooooowly rolled off me and curled beside the bed, tail flicking like he hadn’t just tried to smother me with love.

I exhaled dramatically, arms flopping out. "That felt like hiking up a mountain. While wearing three cloaks. And armor."

Osric stood again, chuckling under his breath. "Glad to see your spirit is still... lively."

I narrowed my eyes. "That sounded dangerously close to mockery, Sir Dungeoned."

He didn’t deny it.

He just looked at me.

And then—he didn’t stop looking.

Our eyes met, held, and for a heartbeat longer than normal, neither of us moved. The air between us shifted. Something unspoken passed. Something warm. And heavy.

Then softly—he spoke.

"Thank you."

I blinked. "For what?"

Before I could blink again, he stepped closer and reached out—fingers wrapping around mine like a promise.

"For not dying," he said, voice quiet. Honest. "I guess."

I stared down at our hands, now tangled together in a way that felt... familiar and foreign all at once.

We’d held hands before. Of course we had. We’d danced at court balls, we’d walked through palace corridors during winter festivals. He’d kissed the back of my hand like a good knight more times than I could count in the name of greetings.

But this?

This wasn’t ceremony.

His hand felt warm. Real. Unshaking. Like he was anchoring me—not to duty, not to tradition—but to him.

I looked up at him and smiled gently. "Don’t worry... I won’t leave you alone. Not until you decide to walk away from me of your own will."

His grip tightened, just enough to make my heart hiccup.

"I will never leave your side, Princess," he said, firm and steady. "Not even death could drag me away."

...Oh.

Well.

Now my lungs were doing funny things.

There was a beat of silence.

Marshi’s tail flicked once beside me. The divine beast, who had been pretending to be asleep, was definitely listening now. (Traitor.)

I glanced at Osric again and cleared my throat, trying to will away the strange warmth creeping up my neck.

"Well then," I said quickly, pointing toward Marshi without looking away, "you’ve just made a very dramatic promise... and he"—I jabbed a finger at my tiger—"is the divine witness now."

Marshi lifted his head, gave a solemn blink, and let out a low rumble that translated to something like: Noted. Sworn. Logged for future judgment.

I smiled and leaned back into Marshi’s warm side, snuggling into golden fur. "Alright, I’m going to sleep now. If anyone tries to kill me again, tell them I’m off-duty."

Osric straightened a little. "Oh... then I should take my leave."

He hesitated. Just for a breath. Like he didn’t want to go.

(For the record, I didn’t want him to go either.)

But he turned anyway.

His footsteps were light, respectful. But halfway to the door, I peeked open one eye and watched him.

"...You know," I mumbled into Marshi’s side, "he’s looking way too handsome after coming from the dungeon."

Marshi blinked, expression clearly judging me.

I nudged him with my elbow. "What? It’s suspicious! Does the dungeon have some kind of enchanted beauty mist in the air? Is that where he’s been hiding all this glow?"

Marshi snorted, then dramatically rolled over so his back was to me, tail swiping across my face like a shush. I laughed softly and buried my smile against his fur.

[Osric’s POV – Palace Corridor, Outside the Princess’s Chamber]

Did she call me handsome?

No, wait—she did. I heard it.

My ears aren’t broken.

Handsome, she said.

Their faces were blank—but a little too blank. That dangerous brand of guard poker-face they use when watching nobles make fools of themselves.

"No one leaves this hallway," I said, voice low and lethal. "Not even to breathe. If anyone so much as blinks suspiciously, I want to hear about it."

Time to find the rat.

The one who dared to touch her cup. The one who dared to try and kill her. I clenched my jaw as I walked, boots hitting marble with clipped precision.

This wasn’t just an assassination attempt. It was a declaration. Someone had sent a message right into the heart of the empire—and they’d used her as the parchment.

That meant Emperor was already preparing to end it.

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