My Promised Rejection (Olivia) novel Chapter 9

1 Have No Mother

1 fel lite i can breathe. One minuts im yelling at my twother and mother, then the next the monitor starts to

scream. The room is flooded with people, and I’m shoved out of the way I watch as a man in a long white

seat starts to push on my father’s chest. As much as I want to deny what’s happening. I know what CPR is and if it’s happening to my father, it’s not good 1 stand there watching as they try to save his life

Deddy, please don’t leave me, I manage to cry out before a nurse pushes me out of the room. As soon as I’m

in the hallway. I crumple to the floor. This can’t be happening. He wouldn’t leave me. Strong familiar arms

scoop me up. I want to pull away from him, but I don’t have the strength. Besides, at this moment, I need him When he starts to rock me, I completely lose control of my emotions.

I feel like a beach that is being pummeled by waves as emotion after emotion rolls through me. Anger,

sadness, and regret are the strongest. When the door opens to the room, I manage to find the strength to slide out of Connor’s lap. I turn to face the doctor that I just watched minutes earlier, trying to save my father’s life. His expression lets me know everything even before he speaks the words. “We did everything we

could, but we were unable to save him,” he says directly to me.

Before I can stop myself, I scream “no” and rush through the door. The nurses are flitting around the room clearing away the wires and tubes, but what I notice the most is how still my father is. No movement, not even the rise and fall of his chest. He is truly gone. He left me. One of the nurses look up at me with sympathy in her eyes. I don’t want or need her sympathy right now. All I want is my dad to wake up. To tell me

he won’t leave me. To tell me, all of this has been a bad dream.

“Miss, why don’t you let us clean him up, and then you can sit with him,” the nurse says. “No, I want to be

here.” She nods and goes back to cleaning up. My feet move of their own volition and without a second

thought I lay my head on my father’s chest. His skin is still warm, but the silence is deafening proof he is

gone. I start to sob as I wrap my arms tightly around him.

“I’m so sorry dad. I never should have left with them. I should have stayed with you. This is all my fault.” “It’s

not your fault, Olivia. It’s mine. I’m the reason all of this has happened, and I’m so sorry. I know you don’t

believe me, but I love your father,” she says. “No, you’re right, I don’t believe a word you say. Now get out. You

don’t deserve to be here. You’re right about this being your fault, and I’ll never forgive you,” I say, never

moving from where I’m lying across my father’s chest.

“Olivia, you’re going to need help. I can make the arrangements,” she starts to say. I immediately stand to my

full height and move until I’m standing in her face. “Get the f**k out. I don’t want anything from you. My

father is dead because of you. I hate you. Now leave and don’t let me ever hear you say you love my father

again, you selfish b**ch.” She looks as if I just slapped her, but I couldn’t care in the least.

She bursts into tears and rushes out the door. I take the seat next to my father’s bed and take his hand in

mine. I’m not sure how much time passes when the doctor from earlier steps into the room. “Olivia, I can’t imagine how hard this is, but we need to start the process of moving your father and making arrangements,” he says. I turn to look at him and nod.

Once I’m alone again, I stand and press a kiss on my father’s forehead. “I love you daddy.” I start across the

room and when I reach the door I turn back to look at him one last time. I’m truly alone. “You’ll never be alone,

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Oli a disembodied soft female voice says. I look around even though I know there is no one here with me, Great, on top of losing my father, I’m losing my mind. A soft giggle has me shaking my head,

When I step into the hallway, I’m glad to see only Rebecca. I’m still angry at her, but I couldn’t exactly expect her to keep something like this from Connor. When she notices me, she is on her feet. She stops right in front of me and I know she is holding herself back from wrapping me in her arms. I reach out to pull her into a hug, and she sags in my arms. “I’m so sorry, Oli. He called me when he realized I wasn’t in my room and I didn’t want to lie to him. As angry as I am, I knew he deserved to say goodbye too,” she says as she sobs.

“It’s alright Rebecca. I’m not angry anymore. I know how much you love my brother. As angry as I am at him he was our dad.” Her arms around me tighten. After a few minutes, we make our way to the nurses‘ station. Anger threatens to choke me when I see Xavier and my mother speaking to the nurse. “Why are you still here? Leave, you aren’t welcome. You are the reason he is dead” I practically scream at both of them.

“Enough Olivia. You are not the only one that is hurting. Besides, you have no money to pay for your father’s arrangements,” he says. “Xavier, please” my mother says. “No, Evelyn. She doesn’t get to act like she is the

only one that is hurting. You have all lost someone important to you,” he says. That’s when I lose it.

“Really, he was so important to her that she f**ked you. She left him. She is the reason he died. As for you, I’m sure you’re glad he is dead. I don’t want your money. I have money saved, and I’ll use every last dime to pay for my father before I let your dirty money pay for a damn thing.”

My mother gasps and Xavier starts to move toward me. Rebecca steps in front of me and I see hurt flash in

Xavier’s eyes. “Leave Uncle. I will help Oli with whatever she needs, but she is right. You and your wife shouldn’t be here.” Before Xavier can open his mouth, my mother does. “Take me home, Xavier.” He looks at her and I swear her normally blue eyes are black.

He nods and pulls her to his side. As they pass me, I refuse to look at her. Two hours later all the

arrangements are made and Rebecca is leading me out of the hospital. She leads me over to a car and I slide

into the back seat. I refuse to look at Connor. When we finally reach the place that is even more of a prison

now, I head straight to my room and lock the door. I strip as I make my way into the bathroom.

I make the water as hot as I possibly can before I step under the spray. Sliding down the shower wall, I curl

into a ball and let the tears fall. This is the last time I will let myself fall apart. When the water runs cold, I

turn it off. I dry and dress quickly. Sliding under the blanket sleep immediately takes me under. Visions of my

father plague my dreams.

The sound of someone pounding on my door wakes me from sleep. I refuse to answer it. I don’t want to see any of them. “Oli, it’s me Rebecca.” I roll out of bed and move to open the door. When it swings open, she has a tray covered with different breakfast foods. “I brought you breakfast. You need to make sure you eat,” she says. “I’m not hungry, Becca. I just want to be left alone.” “I know Oli, but I’m not going to let you just cut

yourself off from me. Besides, Xavier wants us in his office in an hour” she says.

“Xavier can go f**k himself. I don’t want to see him or Evelyn.” “I know your angry Oli and you have every right to be, but what they have to say is important. Honestly, they should have told you the day you arrived. Hell,

you should have known all your life,” she says. “I’m not interested in anything either of them have to say.” “Oli,

this isn’t about them, it’s about you. You need to know exactly what you are and why you were brought here,”

she says.

I go to open my mouth, but she cuts me off. “I’m not permitted to tell you, Oli. You’re going to have to suffer through the meeting with Xavier and your mother,” she says. “Evelyn isn’t my mother. I’m an orphan.” She

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A Have No Mother

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