Wild Nights With My Brother's Ex-Best Friend novel Chapter 80

NICOLE

Right now, I can't stay here with him—that's the one thing I know for sure.

I have things to resolve. I might have decided deep inside of me that my relationship with Sebastian is over, but I've got to fix this. I tap Roman's shoulder in the dark and tell him, "I have to go."

He lifts his head quickly. "Go where?"

I don't answer him and merely give him a light shove so he can get off me, which he eventually does. I can't see anything, so I carefully step down from the bed and make my way to the door, which so happens to be right next to the light switch.

When I turn the lights on, everything sinks in at once even before I turn to look at Roman. He's sitting on the bed of the bed, his pants loose. The fly is undone.

He's looking at me in a way that makes me want to run back into his arms and let him fuck me over and over again.

But I can't.

Things have gone too far as it is.

"What's the matter, Nikki?" he asks. My skin crawls at the sound of his voice. It's a caress down my spine. "Talk to me."

"I have to find Sebastian and...make things right."

Roman tilts his head to the side and stands before striding toward me. I'm momentarily distracted by his physique, then remember what's happening.

"What's that supposed to mean?" he asks darkly. "You're going after that guy after what we did here? Are you fucking kidding me? Is this your way of getting back at me?"

I snap, "I'm not vindictive, Roman. Unlike someone I know."

Saying these words out loud just made me realize how true they are. I've never once thought about getting back at him for what he did to me.

Dating Sebastian wasn't for Roman. It was for me...and now it's all over.

Roman closes the distance between us, practically pushing me into the door with his body. Heat seeps from his skin. His forehead touches mine and my heart's pace picks up.

I'll never not have a reaction to his touch. His proximity.

It's almost a condemnation.

"I don't want him to touch you again," he says. "That's an order, Nicole, or I'll kill him and it'll be on you."

"Just stop," I plead.

"Never. You're mine and only mine." He places his hand over my cheek. It's warm and smells of me. "I don't know what it'll take to hammer that thought into your head. Maybe that's exactly what I have to do."

Roman runs his thumb along my lips before pushing the very tip of it into my mouth, settling it on my tongue. His eyes darken.

"You have to leave," I say around his thumb before swatting his hand away. "This is Sebastian's room, in case you haven't noticed."

"Thanks. I haven't."

I look around at the mess we made. The sheets are a mess—how'd we manage to do that?—and the small buttons from his shirt are everywhere. I sigh and say, "Clean this mess up before you leave. And you have to do it quickly."

Roman chuckles. "Bossy, aren't you?"

What now? What do I do now?

I'm on a ship with him in the middle of nowhere. How do I break things off just like that?

But there's no way around it. We'll have to break up. Tears slide down my cheeks —I hadn't even realized that I was crying. I feel terrible. With Roman's strong scent clinging to my skin, I feel even worse.

I need to shower.

I peel my clothes off my body and turn the water on. I need it to be scalding so I can actually feel clean. I wash my hair, then lather my body with shower gel and scrub until I feel raw. I shouldn't have done that with Roman—I regret it so much. But not really. Gah. I'm a mess.

When it comes to Roman Hayes, that's always the case. Nothing is ever clear or steady. He's like a hurricane. He messes my life up. He's destructive.

But I'm addicted to him. And that makes me the sicko, not him.

I can't even find it in me to feel angry about his marriage to another woman. I've lost all sense of dignity the second he shoved his cock into me.

I'm so distracted that I only realize I'm not alone when the shower door opens. I whirl around quickly and see Sebastian standing behind me, totally naked. Deep down, I'd been afraid that he heard something through the door, but the way he's looking at me suggests that he didn't.

And it makes me feel even worse. If he'd heard something, I would've had a foundation to build on.

"What's wrong, sweetheart?" he asks sweetly, placing his hands on my shoulders. "I know we need to talk and I'm ready to do that. I'm willing to do anything to fix this."

I shake my head at him and speak around the knot in my throat. "No, Sebastian. There's no way that this can be fixed."

He looks stunned. I don't give him the chance to talk. "It's over between us."