Alpha Damon (Sienna) novel Chapter 78

Sienna:

By the time I made it back to the pack house, the sun had already started to set, bleeding golden light through the trees that surrounded the estate. My shoulders ached, my legs felt like they had walked twice the distance, and all I wanted was to close my eyes and forget how hard this day had been.

But I couldn’t.

No matter what was going to happen, I could not close my eyes and get some sleep. Not now.

Not when everything was still so unfamiliar.

Not when every step I took echoed with judgment.

Not when everyone was looking at me, waiting for the alpha’s reaction, waiting for what was going to happen, waiting for his anger to burst on me. Though I knew that he wouldn’t throw it on me. Not now.

The job itself wasn’t terrible. The people were… polite. Not warm, not welcoming but not cruel either. They looked at me like someone who didn’t quite belong but was being tolerated for now. It was a place that I was going to be dealing with and it was something that I wanted to do, I was going to prove myself to myself first and to those that are surrounded me.

I kept my head high, reminded myself that I wasn’t doing this for them. I was doing this for me. And for Isla.

I entered through the back, not wanting to run into anyone. Not Damon. Not Evelyn. Not any of the maids who still hesitated before speaking to me. I walked quietly to my old room, the one Evelyn had kindly set up again after everything. The one that felt more like a memory than a home.

The moment I closed the door behind me, I leaned back against it and exhaled slowly.

It was strange.

Coming back to the same four walls that had once been filled with innocence and dreams, only to now feel like they were holding together the pieces of a girl I wasn’t anymore.

I slipped off my shoes and padded to the small dresser where I’d left a few of Isla’s things. A soft onesie. A tiny hat. The lavender blanket Evelyn had given her. I ran my fingers along the fabric, letting the texture ground me.

She was the reason I was still here. The reason I hadn’t broken. The reason I had gone back to work when everything in me had screamed to stay curled in bed.

I missed her.

Even if I saw her every day… I missed being with her. I missed the comfort her tiny breaths gave me. The calm her warm body brought when she lay against my chest.

I sat on the edge of the bed and finally allowed myself to sigh into the silence.

And that’s when I heard the knock.

Not the kind of knock that asked for permission.

The kind that warned you someone was coming in.

I swallowed hard, unsure what to say. I wrapped my arm around myself as if holding myself down, not knowing how I should be reacting. This was not something that I expected to come home too, if I could call it a home anyway. The one place that I felt like I belonged was when I had my daughter in my arms.

“You don’t have to forgive me,” she said, turning back toward the door. “But I thought you deserved to hear it. Especially after everything you’ve endured.”

The silence stretched between us.

“Thank you,” I whispered.

Evelyn nodded once. “You should eat something. I’ll have one of the maids bring something up.” And with that, she left.

I sat there for a while longer, staring at the space she’d occupied, her words still lingering in the air.

Maybe things weren’t going to be as cold as they felt. Maybe… just maybe, there was still space for me here.

I looked toward the crib, imagining Isla tucked inside, her tiny hands reaching out in sleep.

“For you, my little light,” I murmured. “I’ll keep trying.”