Alpha Damon (Sienna) novel Chapter 84

Sienna:

The moment Damon stormed out of the room, I leaned against the closed door, my heart hammering in my chest like a wild animal begging to be let out. It was a feeling that I did not find myself liking. It was a feeling that I found myself resenting. I found myself wanting nothing more than for my whole body to calm down. And yet I knew that it wouldn’t.

I didn’t understand what just happened. I did not understand how I could allow him to have such an effect on me, no matter how hard I try to deny him that I couldn’t bring myself to do so, not after everything that we’ve been through. The mind just seemed to find a way to affect me no matter how hard I tried to stop him.

One moment he was taunting me, daring me to break, then looking at me like I was the only thing keeping him from falling apart. The next… he was gone. Gone and away from the room, almost for good. It was as if he had disappeared. But I knew that he didn’t.

I stood there for a long moment, still wrapped in my towel, the steam from my shower clinging to my skin. My chest ached with something I couldn’t quite name. And my body, my body was betraying me in ways I didn’t want to admit. The heat in my body was one that I did not want to feel towards him. I wanted this to be towards someone that I wanted to be with. And yet my body reacted to his touch. All he had to do was look at me. All he had to do is extend his hand.

He hadn’t even touched me. Not really.

But I could still feel him.

I could still feel his kiss, his eyes on mine, his hunger, the lust that was between us, and I could feel how much he wanted this just as much as I did. At least that was what I saw. I could have been wrong.

But the way his voice dropped just before he left. The way his eyes flicked to my lips, down my chest, like he was restraining himself from dragging me to him. The tension between us had shifted. It was no longer just about resentment or old wounds. It was something darker, deeper. It was something that was cutting through the two of us and I did not know how long it would take him before he ended up giving in to it, how long it would take me before I gave into him. Before I pulled him closer to me.

I let out a shaky breath, my fingers brushing over my bare collarbone.

Right where he had kissed me.

The way his hands skillfully moved down my body, the way that he pushed me towards the bed, his touch gentle despite the hunger that I felt.

I was not going to fall for this.

I wasn’t going to let him suck me back into his orbit only to throw me out the second I let my guard down again. I wouldn’t survive that a second time.

I was not going to allow myself to throw everything that I was trying hard to maintain simply because I knew that he wanted me for a moment of lust.

But god, the way he looked at me…

The way that he touched me.

The way he spoke.

I turned away from the door and moved toward the dresser, pulling out a simple oversized shirt and slipping it on. My skin still tingled, heat rising across my thighs. I pressed my knees together, shaking my head.

No.

I kissed her forehead, whispering, “It’s you and me, Isla. No matter what.”

But even as I laid her down in the crib beside my bed, I couldn’t stop the image of Damon from flashing through my mind.

The way his voice dropped when he said my name.

The hunger in his gaze.

The restraint in his muscles, like he was holding back from touching me.

I curled into bed, my hand resting near Isla’s crib, staring at the ceiling.

I hated him.

But I also couldn’t stop wanting him.

And somehow… I had a feeling he knew that too.