Brother’s Best Friends Are My Mates novel Chapter 68

Rain

Fuck I was a nervous wreck.

I had been training for… what felt like weeks. Bulking up and trying to make sure my skills were sharp and fresh.

It brought me to this point; waiting in the lobby of the clan’s headquarters waiting to be called up for my trial. Everyone had come with me and was sitting beside me, wanting to make sure I had support. I kept flashing nervous smiles in their direction, hoping they wouldn’t pick up how nervous I was but they had to see it.

Everyone always loved to tell me I was the type of person who wore their heart on their sleeve. It was exhausting that I lived that way, but I didn’t know any other way to be.

“Rain, you’re sweating bullets,” Lia whispered to me.

I paled. “Am I?”

“Yes and you look pale,” Colby pointed out. “If your goal is to look more like a vampire; good news. You’ve done it!”

The laugh bubbled out of my throat before I could stop myself. I threw my head back and started cracking up laughing. It drew the attention of several people nearby, causing them to cast me some dirty looks.

“Hey, I find enjoyment in life! Why is that a crime all of a sudden?”

Lia shook her head. “It’s not a problem if you want to showcase your joy but you are causing a bit of a scene, Rain.”

“It’s helping me calm down,” I admitted, sinking further into my seat. “If I don’t express joy then I’ll end up babbling about pointless shit and Jesse will tell me to shut up. You know how he can get when I babble-“

“Rain?” Jesse asked, tone flat.

I whimpered. “Yes?”

“Be quiet.”

“See?!” I exclaimed, even going so far as to jump to my feet and glare at him.

But I realized the scene I was making so I sat down, trying to ignore the looks that even my packmates were giving me.

The five of us sat there, trying to pass the time until they called out my name. I shifted., unable to think of anything else except the impending trial I was going to have to complete. Lia reached out to pat my hand, running her soft thumbs over my knuckles.

“It’ll be okay, Rain. Just think positively!”

I paled. “I think if I try to think positively I might try to psych myself out or something.

Then they called my name. I stiffened, looking at Lia. She smiled, giving me a thumbs-up gesture.

“Go on. You can do it.”

With a shaky breath, I decided it was time to get up and attempt this trial.

I could do it.

***
I couldn’t do it.

With tears in my eyes, I walked back out into the waiting area and was unable to meet anyone’s gaze. They looked at me, somber looks on all their faces.

“I didn’t get in.”

Lia pulled me into a gentle hug, rubbing my back.

“It’ll be okay, Rain. Can’t you try again?”

I nodded. “I can, but I was supposed to do it the first time!”

What if I were to fail a second time? That meant I only had one last attempt and if I failed the third time there would be no more attempts for me.

I stared straight ahead, refusing to look at anyone but the wall.

Shame was mostly what I was feeling now. A hell of a lot of shame, but there was nothing I could do about it.

I had to tell my mother. She was the one person who would understand.

The other people who had tried got in, but I didn’t. It was… more than a little embarrassing.

“Did you see everyone else who attempted the trial?” I asked in the car.

Everyone gazed at me with different expressions. Jesse’s was natural as usual while Lia and Colby looked sympathetic. Matt looked angry on my behalf.

“Yeah and they probably cheated or something,” Matt grumbled. “How is it fair that you are held on the same level they are when you’re the one who just found out he was a vampire?”

I huffed. “Yeah I think that’s a good point but there’s nothing I can do about it now. Either I pass their trial or I don’t get in the clan.”

During the drive, I texted my mom hoping to get her input and support.

Hey, Mom. I tried the clan initiation today. Didn’t make it.

R

That’s okay, sweetheart. I’m so proud of you for trying. These things take time, and it’s all part of the journey. Every step is progress, even if it doesn’t feel that way right now.

M

M

Thanks, Mom. You always know what to say. But it still feels so hard. Like… like I’m not where I’m supposed to be. Like I’m stuck.

R

Rain, you’re not stuck-you’re growing. And growth doesn’t always feel like progress. Sometimes it’s messy. Sometimes it feels slow. But it’s still progress. Stop looking at where you think you should be, and take a moment to see how far you’ve already come. That’s what matters. Every step forward is a victory.

M

It’s not easy, though. It’s so hard.

R

Sweetheart, it’s not supposed to be easy. Nothing worth having ever is. But I know you, and I know how strong you are. I’ve seen you face challenges head-on, even when they seemed impossible. You’ve got a fire inside you, Rain. Trust it. Let it guide you, one step at a time. You’re going to get through this-I’m sure of it.

M

Thanks, Mom. You always make me feel a little less like a failure.

R

That’s because you’re not a failure. You’re a fighter, Rain. Fighters don’t quit when things get tough. They dig deep, find their strength, and keep going. And that’s exactly what you’re doing. I’m so proud of you, and I always will be.

M

Okay. I’ll try again. I promise.

R

That’s all I needed to hear. And remember, sweetheart, this is just one chapter in your story. You’ll pass that test, and when you do, it’ll be because you earned it. Not for anyone else for yourself.

M

Thanks, Mom. I love you.

R

I love you more, Rain. Now get some rest. You’ve got a mountain to conquer, and I know you will-one way or another.

M