Shattered by the Alpha Stronger Than Ever novel Chapter 123

Chapterlog

“But how?” I whispered, feeling a little uncomfortable about repeating the same question, yet unable to shake off my skepticism. It was hard for me to wrap my head around the fact that a man of his age, with his level of attractiveness and charm, could still be a virgin. Had he never felt tempted by someone? Never been attracted to anyone? Never lost control of his desires? What about the natural frustration that came with suppressing his sexual urges? Men were often said to have stronger sex drives than women, so how did he manage to keep his desires in check for so long? Was this level of loyalty and self–control even humanly possible?

“I had a hell of a lot of things to keep me distracted and occupied,” he replied, his tone slightly pressing, as if he was wondering if I doubted his words. His eyes narrowed slightly, scrutinizing me, but he continued nonetheless.

“And even if I was surrounded by an army of women, I wouldn’t want them. My loyalty is for you, heart, body, and soul” His words envelopes me, leaving me breathless and disbelieving. I felt a lump form in my throat as I struggled to process the depth of his devotion. Had I been so brutally betrayed that this extreme level of loyalty seemed unfathomable to me?

“Deckard,” I mumbled his name, my voice trembling as I struggled to hold back the tears that blurred my vision. The influence of his words hooking deep within me and I felt the sting of sorrow. He had loved me, silently and steadfastly, even as I had given my heart to another. He had watched me love Keith, had seen me build a life with him, all while keeping his own feelings locked away, hidden behind his selfless friendship. The fact was almost too much to bear, and grief clashes punches me as I thought about the pain he must Jhave endured, the loneliness he must have felt. And yet, despite it all, he had remained committed to me, had considered himself mine,

even when I hadn’t given him a second thought, even when I had seen him as nothing more than a friend.

“Why didn’t you ever tell me, Deckard?” I asked, it was a whin, a plea as I stared into his eyes. They were so warm, so unguarded, that I felt like I could go deep and yet never discover the surface. I couldn’t look away, didn’t want to look away, as I searched for answers in his gentle, loving gaze. Deckard’s eyes held mine, his expression soft and vulnerable, as if he was finally allowing me to see the real him, the him he had kept hidden for so long

“I tried to,” be protested faintly, with wistfulness as he ran a hand through his hair. “Remember when I asked you out for coffee before I was deployed? When you turned eighteen?” His words simulated a memory, and I telt heat of guilt rise to my cheeks as realization dawned on me. He hadn’t asked me to meet him at the garden cafe just because it was my favorite spot; he had asked me on a date, a chance to confess his feelings.

I recalled how I had overslept that day, and by the time I woke up, Deckard was already gone. That was the summer I met Keith, and the pain of what could have been hit me like a brutal waves of a destructive tsunami. The cutting regrets, slashing my left insides, knowing that I had dodged a beautiful, loving man like Deckard, only to choose someone like Keith, who had never been capable of loving me wholly

“I remember, but why didn’t you tell me after that?” I pressed on, as I struggled to comprehend why Deckard had kept his feelings hidden for so long. “You had plenty of occasions before I got together with Keith, 1 pointed out, my mind racing with the what–ifs.

Internally, I was panicking, reliving the memories of how I had blindly walked into Keith’s arms, only to be broken by him. Meanwhile, Deckard, the one person who could have cherished me like a jewel, who held onto me as his first and only choice, had been standing right in front of me, his heart beating with a love that I had never acknowledged.

“You were always so happy talking about him,” he attested, his eyes brimming with a long lived sadness. “You said you already liked him, wanted to be with someone like him every time I convinced myself to come clean, I would tear losing this friendship.” He paused, his lips pressing together as he struggled to contain his emotions.

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